Baby Bunyan Weighs In!

I think it might be an understatement to say that I am a BIG baby. At just two weeks old, I already weigh in at 100 pounds. That's as much as a large deer! When I am hungry, there's no Happy Meal that is going to fill me up! I am always starving and for a typical breakfast my mom has to cook 5 dozen eggs, 10 sacks of potatoes, and a half barrel of mush. The most unusual thing that people often notice about me, besides my HUGE size was my full black beard! A beard on a baby tends to make people stare! My mom is a huge fan of baby pictures. Here are a couple that she is adding to her scrapbook:

My "Special" Delivery

"Can I get a little trim, Mom?"

Crawling is NO joke!

Like any other baby, I have begun to crawl. However, it has not been cause for celebration around here. You see I weigh over 500 pounds, so it doesn't go unnoticed when I start moving around. Just last week, the vibrations from my crawling shook the whole town so much that the townspeople thought there was an earthquake. Let's just say they were a little miffed!
Yesterday, because of the uproar, my parents decided to put me in my cradle in the harbor to avoid the vibrations. However, because my cradle is so large, this morning the rocking caused the entire village to flood!
Here is the story that aired on the local news:

Dark Days

I am still in diapers and am considered to be a toddler, but about a month ago, my parents decided it was time for me to leave home. There was a huge amount of outrage from our townspeople, because of the earthquakes and floods. My parents could not take any more! They took me out into the Maine wilderness and found a dark cave, which has become my new home. I have cried an entire river of tears, and I may cry myself to death. I will update more later, but I need to go and see what that noise is...

My new home!

The river in the picture was actually created by my tears!

Fishing Therapy

That sound I heard was the flopping of fish in my river of tears. The only thing that could have been louder than my sobs was the sound of my stomach growling. I decided to use my father's fishing pole to catch some trout for dinner. I think I smiled today for the first time since my parents left me here!

The best dinner EVER!

21 Baby! and Babe!

Well it's been almost 20 years since I blogged, but I had a pretty big day today. The last 20 years I have been alone in the wilderness, but those days are OVER! This morning I woke up singing Happy Birthday to myself, as I have done every year since my parents deserted me. The weather is very cold right now and this morning there were lots of snow gusts blowing in front of the mouth of my cave. There was nothing unusual about that, however the snow itself was BLUE!

I went to check it out, having never seen blue snow before, . When I came out of my cave, I heard the sound of a baby crying. I looked around for a while and suddenly I saw a tail sticking out of the blue snow! When I pulled on the tail, out came the biggest baby ox on Earth! He was frozen solid and BLUE!

Even after being thawed out, he has remained BLUE! I have named him Babe and I am hoping he will be a great friend for a long time!

Trees, Trees Everywhere!

The trees around here are beautiful, however, the pioneers around here need them to build things. They are being used for churches, houses, ships, wagons, and barns. I figured I could offer some help, since I am a pretty good tree chopper. So last week I decided to invent "logging". I've been able to chop down 10 tall pines in one swing. Babe and I can cross one mile with one step, so we are really able to cover a lot of ground.

This morning, we even helped with a log jam in the Big Onion River. The river was way too crooked for all of the logs to pass through easily. I tied a rope to one end of the river and the other end to Babe's harness. Babe pulled and pulled until that Big Onion River was "straight as a gun barrel"!


Before


After

What makes my tale "TALL"?

A tall tale is a story with bigger than life events, told as if it was a true story. Sometimes they are exaggerations of real events. A lot of my stories are bigger than life and could not really happen. In the wordle below, you can see the specific language and events that make my tale "TALL"!